Spiritual transport

You've lived in Sebastopol for a long time when you receive a text from someone in an ambulance, and you believe you read they are "in an abundance..."  I was thinking, an abundance of what?

A comment on Sebastoblog's sister column (about consciousness):
Don't forget my personal favorite "Conscious Roommate Wanted."  I can never decide whether that sets the bar too high, or too low!

In Whole Foods:  "We can't bring her pop tarts made with acai berries.  She's never going to go for that!"

Facebook status updates: 
"You know how you know you live in Sebastopol?  Wherever you go it smells like pot and patchouli oil."
"Chillin' on my bench downtown watchin' this old hippie try to light his joint with a magnifying glass.  Only in Sebastopol..."
(Apparently he was successful.)

A text to a local after her brother-in-law visited:  "Land of the hipsters, wine tasters and last stand of the old school hippies."

A friend, having tried to do a voice group text, glanced down frustrated at the mangled names of her co-workers.  "Goddamn Sebastopol and all of these hippie names!"

My co-worker (decidedly un-west county) informed everyone he had reached "a new low" by driving through Sebastopol in a Prius.

"I cannot do math, I just got out of yoga."
"I can't really do math any time."
"I'm fine with math, except right after yoga.  I also can't handle listening to NPR."

I was chatting with a woman while waiting outside a class for my niece.  The conversation turned to local preschools and kindergarten.  She noted at one point, "It's like it becomes a political statement. 'We are Waldorf.  We are not Waldorf.'  Do we really have to figure all that out by the age of three?!"


License plates:
INSPYR U
DUK DWN
RD HAWK
AGL WINGS






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Mere recycling

At Community Market:
"If I hear one more time that Mercury is in retrograde!  I don't want to know.  Tell me when it's OUT of retrograde!"

On Facebook:
"Conscious Ink Manifestation Tattoos feature empowering messages & imagery designed to support you in manifesting your deepest desires!"

A therapist told me about a west county couple who came to see her when she was an intern.  Often the issues between partners are about money or housework or childcare, but this couple caught her off guard when the husband complained, "She just meditates too much.  It's one of the reasons we're here.  It's really become a problem."

"One thing I've learned living here, hippies are not Buddhists.  They have a lot in common but when it comes to bugs and flies, they'll leave their doors open all day and don't care that there are dead flies all over the kitchen.  I tried to explain to [my neighbor] that maybe you shouldn't do something that will end up killing a lot of flies, and he just stared at me, like 'what are you talking about?'  But they don't like it if you bring carrots to a pot luck that aren't organic."

On looking for housing:  "How far does the line go?  You shouldn't be discriminated against for race, religion, etc.  But in Sebastopol you could be discriminated against astrologically.  You could not get housing because you're not the right sign.  'Sorry, can't rent to an Aries.'"

According to a woman I ran into who I knew years ago, it is annoying to have a guy mansplain to you.  However, it is even more annoying to have a guy holy-mansplain.  It's a double whammy, the sexist patronizing coupled with the condescending, "I'm more evolved than thou and therefore must explain to you why you have not evolved as far as I have because you are merely recycling instead of using your own container.  And did I mention how spiritual I am?"

The day after the eclipse I was in a downtown store where a few people were sharing eclipse stories.  A cashier remarked, "Well, it's Sebastopol so it brought a lot of crazies out."
"I don't think you need an eclipse to bring out the crazies around here."


License plates:
WHRLWND
H2O GOD
I GOT THS
MSDMNR

Shout out to Golden Gear Automotive (next to the post office).  Reasonable and good customer service.
https://www.yelp.com/biz/golden-gear-automotive-sebastopol