I was by the Cookie Company and heard a woman say to her friend, "Let's go get some cookies and sit outside and listen to this wacky guy playing the ukulele. Oh, look, people are even giving him money. I love this town!" I also saw a flier for a room rental, which apologized at the end of it: "I'm sorry, I know this is Sebastopol. But I am not a healthy eater, not vegetarian and I have a free pass to a yoga studio I never use."
And while walking by Rite-Aid a few days later with a group of people, one commented while looking at her phone:
"Hey, the Apple Blossom festival is on the new moon."
Person walking with her: "I don't think that was planned."
Third person. "Well, you never know around here."
A singer who recently performed here was swigging cherry bark syrup during her performance. She joked in between songs this was the Sebastopol version of a Red Bull.
Guy standing by my car while I was loading some groceries, talking to his friend on speakerphone: "What kind of vibrations are you talking about? Because look where we are. Festival vibes. California vibes. Ocean vibes. West county vibes... Just saying 'vibes' doesn't help."
I was at Papas and Pollos with my toddler niece. We went to sit on a bench and there was a small, thick pillow. "I want to sit on the meditation pillow," she told me.
Several weeks ago I was running late meeting someone so I called to let her know I'd be there shortly. She was waiting in the plaza, and texted me back: "Don't worry, I'm fine. Just sitting here enjoying the sun and a nice contact high."
License plates cont.:
WCOUNTY
NOTICE
WDSTK 2
LI-10 UP
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A humorous blog about Sebastopol encounters
Monday, April 27, 2015
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Envision your supplements returning
A friend of mine who describes herself as "entirely unspiritual" texted me when she was in Sebastopol recently: "Love the envision."
Yeah, I thought when I read it, I have no idea what she is talking about. About a week later I was in my car and noticed white and blue streamers spelling out the word 'envision' on a fence right before I got into town.
Oh, that envision.
At the park with my niece, I seated myself on a bench next to a woman watching several young children. She told me they had been in a coffeehouse on Main Street and as she was getting everyone together to leave, she set her phone down with a bottle of supplements. A few minutes later she realized she didn't have her phone. Racing back, she was relieved her phone had been turned in. But the bottle was gone. She laughed, remarking, "You've got to love a town where someone turns in an expensive phone but swipes a bottle of digestive enzymes."
Wandering around the Farmer's Market, I heard a babysitter say to a young boy: "Well, let's look and see. If your mom packed snacks it's probably cashews and chard and celery sticks. If your dad packed it then you probably have cupcakes and gummy bears."
Little boy: "I want some chard."
Babysitter: "Seriously... that's your first choice?" Then she muttered parenthetically, "I don't think I knew what chard was at your age."
Filling my water bottles at Whole Foods I half-noticed a teenager walk up to her mom who was next to me. She dumped some items in a cart. Her mom handed some hummus back to her daughter shaking her head. "What is this garlic-basil-cilantro-parsley-pesto-pine nut stuff, probably with kale in it? She won't eat that. Just plain hummus, or better yet maybe some artichoke dip."
(And yes, I had to ask her to repeat her descriptive diatribe for me. It was actually just pesto hummus.)
And also at Whole Foods: "I think we need to get the right wine. I mean, we are serving a bunch of liberals tonight."
More license plates:
U BECOME
H20 FALL
N HRMONY
C BRZES
Yeah, I thought when I read it, I have no idea what she is talking about. About a week later I was in my car and noticed white and blue streamers spelling out the word 'envision' on a fence right before I got into town.
Oh, that envision.
At the park with my niece, I seated myself on a bench next to a woman watching several young children. She told me they had been in a coffeehouse on Main Street and as she was getting everyone together to leave, she set her phone down with a bottle of supplements. A few minutes later she realized she didn't have her phone. Racing back, she was relieved her phone had been turned in. But the bottle was gone. She laughed, remarking, "You've got to love a town where someone turns in an expensive phone but swipes a bottle of digestive enzymes."
Wandering around the Farmer's Market, I heard a babysitter say to a young boy: "Well, let's look and see. If your mom packed snacks it's probably cashews and chard and celery sticks. If your dad packed it then you probably have cupcakes and gummy bears."
Little boy: "I want some chard."
Babysitter: "Seriously... that's your first choice?" Then she muttered parenthetically, "I don't think I knew what chard was at your age."
Filling my water bottles at Whole Foods I half-noticed a teenager walk up to her mom who was next to me. She dumped some items in a cart. Her mom handed some hummus back to her daughter shaking her head. "What is this garlic-basil-cilantro-parsley-pesto-pine nut stuff, probably with kale in it? She won't eat that. Just plain hummus, or better yet maybe some artichoke dip."
(And yes, I had to ask her to repeat her descriptive diatribe for me. It was actually just pesto hummus.)
And also at Whole Foods: "I think we need to get the right wine. I mean, we are serving a bunch of liberals tonight."
More license plates:
U BECOME
H20 FALL
N HRMONY
C BRZES
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